Women Can Pee Standing Up Too!

Have you ever wanted to be able to urinate with the efficiency of a guy? Well, you have always been able to, you just have never been taught the technique. That's what I'm going to do right now. The excerpt you are about to read was taken from a blog by a writer who calls herself "Kimber the Wolfgrrrl" among the many instructions for this method I have read, this was the best and most entertaining. Enjoy.... "Part of writing professionally is sending out work to prospective magazines, and that results in receiving rejection notices. This isn't a bad thing -- sometimes what you've written just isn't right for the publication. That's cool. I try my best to send appropriate material to journals, but sometimes my spidey senses are off. S'no problem. A few years ago, I wrote an article called "Stand Your Ground: The Female Art of Urination", which was accepted by Herizons Magazine. It was published nationally and went on to all sorts of places, ending up on reading lists for feminist literature at a couple of universities here & there. I got quite a bit of feedback from women who didn't know that girls can learn to pee standing -- it isn't easy to learn, but it's possible, and it's a REALLY handy trick for a girl to have! So, knowing it's been a few years since the article came out, I pared it down and re-wrote it for an online how-to magazine and sent it off to them. I didn't know if they'd want it or not, and from the rejection letter, they don't. Again, that's okay. But one part of the rejection note really irked me, and I've been out in my garden, trimming back the geraniums, and trying to figure out why it bugged me as much as it has. Like I said, getting rejection notices is not anything new -- I know it's just a part of the business. Then I realized, it was one little line in the note. The editor wrote, "This information is not "article-worthy", given that everyone knows how to do it." Do they? Really? Because, from the feedback I've received over the last few years, that's not the impression I've been given. So I figured, if they don't want it for their magazine, that's okay by me, but I don't think all women DO know how to 'do it' -- nice euphamism, by the way -- and summertime is the season when women camp, hike, travel, and portage into the most bathroom-unfriendly locations. So in the interest of helping out those women who DON'T know that (with a little practice) they can avoid trickling down their own legs, I am putting my short how-to article up here. Maybe 99.9% of women already know how to pee standing up, and they just never talk about it, but for that last lone woman who thinks that she's chained to a life of squatting over crusty toilets, trying to disinfect her thighs afterwards with a crumpled wet-nap fished out of the bottom of her purse... sister, this is for you. How to Pee Standing Up: A Guide for Adventurous Women From the earliest days of childhood, we're separated into two camps: those who sit and those who stand. Yet as recently as 150 years ago, women stood as often as men to relieve themselves, and in many countries -- India and the Philippines, for example -- it is still a widespread and acceptable practice. In his book The Histories, Herodotus wrote "Women [in Egypt] urinate standing up, men sitting down," a revelation that shocked his Greek sensibilities, and amongst the matrilineal Tualag people of the Sahara , this method of division has continued into the present day. Girls in Western countries have been hoodwinked into believing that the efficiency of standing to urinate is the sole capacity of boys. When presented with a non-Western toilet, most women born in Western countries are confounded -- and unaware of their own abilities. But standing to urinate does have its advantages when you're camping, traveling, or trapped in a filthy public restroom. And with a little practice, you can learn to do it, too. Here's a few tricks to master the art of standing to pee: 1. Like any new skill, it takes practice! You may want to start practicing in the shower. 2. Stand with your feet about a shoulder's width apart. 3. The easiest method is to make a "V" with two fingers to hold the outer labia aside. 4. Then, using as much pressure as possible, release. With each attempt, you'll get better. The key to success is to figure out exactly where to put your fingers, and in what direction to apply pressure. Don't compare your success or failure to the boys -- they've had a head start and a lifetime of practice. And most importantly, don't give up! With practice, you'll master the art of standing to pee, and the next time you're camping, you'll be glad you did."